Big as Sky, Small as Bugs

Evening has drawn to a close and nighttime is upon us once again. This is one of those nights where I find myself already stressing about tomorrow and don't really have a reason why. I think about what I want to get accomplished and already am feeling that I won't get any of it done. Negative thinking only gives a negative outcome.

I need to just put the brakes on that way of thinking. Not only the brakes, but I need to put it entirely out of commission before it even takes hold. But how? I put my head into my hand, adopting a Winnie-The-Pooh posture, saying "Think, think, think".

Hmmm, nothing.

I better drink some coffee. With caramel drizzled on top.

But it's nighttime and caffeine is not the wisest of choices. Now, chocolate on the other hand, in small quantity, is perfectly acceptable. I think I have a jar of caramel in the fridge just perfect for dipping.

Okay, back to "think, think, thinking."
And then I decide to do some walk, walk, walking. Dusk was almost complete, the moon was midway in it's ascent to its peak in the night sky, and the sky was giving one final nod to the day nearly done.

What is it about the sounds that fill the evening, the cadence of crickets, the hum and whir of a multitude of other bugs that make me feel even smaller than they are? Not small in a bad way, but small in comparison to the God who created all of this.

What is it about the sheer vastness of the sky that makes me want to soar? To face tomorrow with determination (defined as "a firmness of purpose"~wow, I like that!) not a defeatist mentality.

In my own strength, I am weak. But I am thankful that God, being the creator of crickets and skies, is my strength. I can't explain it. I can't define it. It just is. He just is. I am most likely not going to get everything accomplished tomorrow that I would like, but I can decide to quit being so ridiculously negative about it.

Remind me tomorrow, okay? Keep me accountable. I don't want to write one thing and do another, but boy-oh-boy is it ever difficult sometimes. I think that's another reason I blog; I want to be real and I don't want to present as a "perfect, have-it-all together" woman in public but then struggle and fail in private. When I put the struggles out there, I don't have to hide behind a facade. And it gives me incentive to try, to put my best foot forward, one step at a time, one day at a time.

Psalm 59:16
But I will sing of your strength, in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble.

Habakkuk 3:19
The Sovereign LORD is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights.

Love,

Dianne