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| An older picture, but one of this mama's favorites. "My Girls" |
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| Late last night... |
The midnight hour approaches and as I sit in the living room, I hear an episode of "Everybody Loves Raymond" playing in the next room and eruptions of laughter from the two young women snuggled on the couch under a pile of blankets and pillows. Watching a television show together, Adrienne and Amy are together on this last night before my most middle child leaves for college. Heather, always Amy's little sister, is camping with the youth group and said her emotional teary goodbyes earlier this evening. My heart breaks a little for my sweet Heather who is struggling the most with the coming changes.
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| Another earlier time... |
It is funny how my girls are so different. Adrienne would've been packed August 1st, with the bags organized by items. Her lists, on paper and on her whiteboard, would have been concise and thorough. Heather would have waited a bit longer to pack and her list would have been in her head. Amy had scattered lists, some on her phone and some on paper scraps, and she pretty much packed it all today, then went to go babysit until 10:30 last night. Can you tell which one is my artsy one? My laid-back, it'll just happen when it happens child?
Speaking of waiting until the last minute, let's talk textbooks. She needs four of them for this looming first semester where she begins the journey of obtaining a degree in Youth Ministry. You want to know how many she has in hand? One. The other three are in transit because, well, we ordered them last week. She's not too worried. I mean, we only knew since June what she would need. I think that this middlest child of mine is very much like her middle child mother. The poor dear.
Honestly, I don't know how I feel about Amy heading off into the world. When Adrienne started college, she started local and stayed local. Even though there are weeks I barely see her as she comes and goes, independent with work, school and church activities, she is still nearby and I know it. Not only that, but she is my first-born who is organized, focused, determined and well, just simply amazing. She is many things that I am not and to say that I am proud is an understatement. She makes me want to go back to elementary school and I want her to be my teacher.
When Aaron decided to move out, I struggled a lot at first with trusting that he would be okay. What if he needed me and I wasn't close? But then he did move and he did wonderfully. He showed incredible maturity and responsibility and my boy was no longer a boy, but a man and my heart burst just a little more with the pride I felt. Then, when he was a groom standing at the alter, I thought my heart would sing. For now, he and Lisa-Anna live in the area and I've been blessed with having my adult children nearby.
Heather and Ryan? Still at home. Whew. I'll just tighten those strings a little tighter for now and decide to enjoy the days, the hours, the moments I have with them. Heather is in 10th grade and I know that before I barely have time to take a breath, she will be packing her bags and ordering textbooks. Hopefully it won't be the night before she leaves for college. Ryan is in 5th grade and I might just have him drink coffee because my mom used to always say "drinking coffee stunts your growth" and he turns 11 in about a week and is already using terms like "preteen" and "puberty". No, no, no.
Amy. It's now morning, the morning she leaves. She stumbles her way past me into the bathroom and I think "I am going to miss this girl of mine." Even when she gets grumpy because we all ask her, "What's wrong?" when nothing is wrong and she informs us that it is just her normal expression and stop asking. I might just have to take up skyping just so I can ask her what's wrong.
Her bags, clothes basket, canvas, art supplies, linens and pillow are all in the kitchen now. She even has miscellaneous unmatched socks tucked in here and there just-in-case in the suitcase. She is eating her eggs and toast as we prepare to leave. I think I may be dragging my feet just a little. But really, I know that she'll be okay. She has God on her side and in her heart. New friendships will be formed and old ones renewed; she already skyped last evening with her future roommate. Her dad and I may not have always done everything by the (parenting) book but it's time to let her go. I'm loosening her strings.
Love,
Dianne and Amy's Mama
P.S. One last note (from a text Leo sent his brother this morning):
"Ryan and I will not be there
Sister Amy has to fix her hair,
She has packed her pail and she's off to Rosedale."
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